Five Questions with Grace Lee
We speak to Grace Lee, one of the latest recipients of The Wheeler Centre Next Chapter Writers’ Scheme.
Grace Lee is a Chinese-Australian writer who has published a novel in China, which she co-wrote with her daughter. Having studied Chinese literature at university, she writes stories inspired by real experiences or events. Writing is a chance to provide different perspectives and challenge homogeneous voices. She seeks to reflect and critique through the creative form of stories. Grace writes her novel in Chinese, and her daughter, Rae Chen, translates her works into English.
For this interview, the first two questions were answered by Grace in Chinese and translated by her daughter into English. The next three questions were answered by Grace in English and edited by Rae.
Grace Lee
No.1
How did you first decide to become a writer?
Our lives are stories. Words have the power to not only capture these stories, but to prompt reflections about the anomalies in human experiences. I believe my life experiences have all pointed me to write.
It was in school that I first discovered the power of stories. My teacher would often read my stories aloud in class as the “model example” of good storytelling, and that planted the seed that have encouraged me to write since.
When I was little, I was always aware that I was not treated the same as my peers. Though born and raised in Shanghai, I did not have my hukou (household registration) in Shanghai. My parents had joined the Party’s call to develop the frontier when they were young, and had settled in the underdeveloped province of Xinjiang to work. Hukou in substance was only a small booklet containing records of each family member’s personal details. Yet this seemingly innocuous booklet yielded great power over individuals. If your name was not in a Shanghai hukou booklet, then you couldn’t live, work or study in Shanghai. You even couldn’t buy many essential products such as meat, rice, flour, oil, cloth, or soap, as all of these products needed a piaozheng (ration ticket). As my hukou was with my parents’ in Xinjiang, my parents had to transfer their Xinjiang piaozheng to national ones and send them by post to my aunt in Shanghai so that my aunt could buy relevant products for me in Shanghai.
For me to attend school in Shanghai, my parents’ workplace had to issue a statement every year to verify that due to the busy nature of their work, they were unable to look after me, and requested that the Shanghai authority would allow me to jiedu (literally “borrow study [position]”) and jiezhu (literally “borrow living [rights]”) in Shanghai with my aunt. However, the process of transitioning from primary school to high school incurred a whole other series of complicated applications. I remember that in order to plead my case to stay in Shanghai, my aunt continuously visited various government departments. Even my primary school principal went to the Department of Education to fight for me to stay, on the basis that it would be a tragic waste if an academically excellent student were sent to the frontier, which was considered “backward” at the time.
As a kid, I had always had a feeling that something wasn’t right about all this. Why didn’t I have the right to choose where I studied and lived? If I hadn’t been a student with excellent marks, where would my life have ended up?
A few years later, my lack of Shanghai hukou culminated in my inability to attend gaokao (the Chinese university entrance exam) in Shanghai. This time, even my school principal couldn’t help me, and I was sent to Xinjiang to attend the exam. To return to Shanghai to attend university, I had to achieve a much higher mark than my Shanghai peers for “not being a local”. Against all odds, I achieved the return to study in a Shanghai university, and yet, when I graduated, I was to be sent back to Xinjiang to contribute to the development work there. But, that was my parents’ choice, not mine! Interestingly, my parents seemed to have forgotten their previous fierce loyalty to the Party and did all they could think of – including bribery – so that I would be allowed to stay in Shanghai to work.
I wondered, what changed their mind? At what cost was it to them and my aunt to at last secure a statement from the Xinjiang government that they would not enforce the policy for me to “return” to work in Xinjiang, as if they owned me?
Having experienced all this, I couldn’t help but feel like a pawn in a game. It shouldn’t have required this absurd amount of effort to achieve the basic human right of where I could live. After the guns were fired in June, 1989, I left the country that I was born and bred in.
30 years later, I have experienced much more. I have watched the land I call guxiang (hometown) undergo enormous changes. The lives of some people who live there have seen much improvement: they no longer need various types of piaozheng to buy essential products; they are earning more than they could’ve dreamed. Every day feels like Chinese New Year in terms of the food and entertainment they can have now. They even think that those of us who chose to go overseas are merely living as second-class citizens in the West. Is this really the case?
Writing is a chance for me to have my say. It is my calling.
In a way, I think my life, all the grace and joy I've received, as well as the setbacks and suffering, have led to the chance to fulfil my calling to write.
我们的人生就是故事，文字具有的能量不仅是记录这些故事，更应表达我们对人生所有不寻常体验的思考。我相信我的人生经历把我从各个方向推向写作。
我最初意识到写作所具有的能量，是在小学里。老师们经常会把我的作文作为范文在班上朗读，这在我的心中撒下了一粒种子，至今鼓励着我继续写作。
我从小就与身边的同伴们不同，我是一个生在上海，长在上海，却没有上海户口的人。因为我父母年轻时响应共产党建设边疆的号召，去了落后艰苦的新疆工作。户口不过就是小小的一个本子，里面的每一页记录着每一位家庭成员的个人信息。可别小看这小小的一个本子，它具有掌控你人生的权力。你的名字若不在上海的户口本里，你就不能在上海生活、工作和上学，你甚至无法在上海买肉买粮买油买布买肥皂等等各种需要票证的商品。我父母必须把政府按我在新疆的户口发放给我的新疆粮票和布票转换成全国通用的粮票布票寄给我姨妈，使我姨妈可以在上海给我买粮买布。至于上学，那是要我父母的工作单位每年开具证明，证明我父母因工作繁忙，无法照顾我，希望上海能允许我在姨妈家借住和在上海的学校里借读。但读完小学要读中学时，是一系列更难的申请。记得姨妈为了我能在上海读中学，不停地跑各种相关的政府部门，连我的小学校长都跑到教育局去为我争取在上海读中学的机会， 因为她觉得让像我这样以门门满分的成绩毕业的学生到新疆那种教育落后的地方上学，太可惜了。
小小的我一直觉得我的生活里有些什么东西是不对劲儿的，为什么我没有选择在哪里读书和居住的权力？如果我成绩不好，我的人生会走向哪里？
不止在哪里读书的问题，因为没有上海户口，我不能在上海参加高考，这一次，连校长都帮不了我，我必须到新疆去参加高考。若想考回上海的大学，我必须考出比上海的同学高得多的成绩！好不容易考回上海的大学，毕业时，因为新疆是边疆，按政策，我必须回新疆工作建设边疆。可这是我父母曾经的选择，不是我的！我的父母这时也好像忘了他们曾经的对党的忠心，千方百计地不惜行贿也要让我留在上海工作。是什么改变了他们？他们和我的姨妈又是付出了什么样的代价，才最后成功地让新疆的政府部门放弃执行要我回新疆的政策，使我得到了在上海工作的机会？这样的经历，让我觉得自己就像一颗任人摆布的棋子，连获得人最基本的权力，我们都得付出匪夷所思的代价。
89年6月的枪声响过之后，我离开了我出生和成长的那片土地。
30年了，我经历了很多。那个我视为故乡的地方也发生了巨大的变化。那片土地上的很多人的生活已经有了很大的改善，他们不再需要凭各种票证才能购买商品，也有了以前想都不敢想的足够多的钱，让他们的日子在吃、穿和娱乐等方面，天天都像过年。他们甚至觉得我们这些选择出国的人不过是在西方做二等公民。
真的是这样吗？我的小说承载着我的思考和回答。
我，命定了是要写作的。我所经历的一切恩典和幸福，挫折和痛苦，都是为了完成这一命定。
No.2
What project will you be working on during The Next Chapter Program?
The novel I am currently working on for The Next Chapter is about a girl who was sold into sexual slavery, deep in the depths of a remote mountain steeped in poverty. She became a “wife”, reduced to being a tool for child-bearing.
It is a tragic story inspired by true events. Through it, I want to explore the conflict between good and evil, love and hatred, shame and dignity. Some difficult questions are also raised. Can acts of goodness truly move and change evil and ignorant hearts? Can they truly remedy, save a deeply scarred soul amidst repeated suffering? Can acts of bearing humiliation and heavy burdens add value to suffering, or unshackle the victim? In the face of evil and pain, should repentance precede forgiveness? The girl in my story spends her whole life seeking the answers to these questions.
I will be writing the novel in Chinese, and my daughter will translate it into English.
我正在写作的小说是关于一个被拐卖进偏僻贫穷的大山深处，成为“人妻”，沦为生孩子工具的女孩的人生。
这是一个基于真实事件的悲剧故事。通过她的人生，我想探索善与恶、爱与恨、羞辱与尊严在人心中的交战。女孩的故事也提出了一些沉重的人性之问：选择行善能真正感动和改变险恶愚昧的人心吗？能救赎深受戕害的心灵吗？人生的苦难能通过忍辱负重来获得价值，来得到真正的释放吗？面对罪恶和伤害，饶恕是否应该有前提——悔改？小说中的她用一生在痛苦中寻求这些问题的答案。
NO.3
What was your first response upon receiving the email confirming your acceptance into the program?
When I first received the call from Veronica at the Wheeler Centre, I was doing walking exercises. She was very kind on the phone, and excited when she told me that I had been selected for The Next Chapter. My first response was, ‘Thank God, thank God!’ I was so excited that I felt that I could run a marathon!
NO.4
What will the Next Chapter mean for you and your practice?
Is it hard to write a novel? The answer is: Not easy! But it is even harder to get your book to the readers, especially when your first language is not English. The greatest help The Next Chapter offers is the connection to publishers and the mentorship, which will help me to improve my craft of writing.
Meeting other writers through the program is also meaningful for me because we receive inspiration through chatting to each other and reading each other's work. More importantly, as we are a diverse group, we receive an invaluable chance to learn more about the different parts of the world and the different cultural backgrounds that the other writers have been experiencing and expressing through their creative works.
The program also allows us to be connected with more art/literature organisations and have access to more opportunities that will be beneficial to our writing and publishing career. This is something I'm really looking forward to.
The financial support from The Next Chapter is also great for writers too, especially for single parent. I always find it hard to struggle between working to earn income and having the energy to be able to spend as much time as possible on writing, which hasn't made any income for me yet. With the financial support from The Next Chapter, I am able to work much less and focus on the novel that I am planning to write, and to stop feeling bad because I used to blame myself for being “lazy” when I didn't have energy to write.
No. 5
What are you currently reading right now? Which books which inspire your work?
Usually, working, writing, doing housework, cooking and reading the news online have occupied my time and I haven't read a lot lately. I receive inspiration from what the Bible says about love, forgiveness and justice, which we do need both in reality and in storytelling.
Virginia Woolf's use of stream of consciousness in Mrs Dalloway taught me about the literary techniques I can use in the novel I'm working on under The Next Chapter program.
I have also re-read some classic novels such as One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel García Márquez, and some of short stories written by Australian writers such as the Australia Day by Melanie Cheng.
I plan to start reading Catching Teller Crow by Ambelin and Ezekiel Kwaymullina upon my daughter's recommendation.
Also, events and issues reported by the media have often given me ideas and inspiration in developing my stories. Reading about the lives of real people from different backgrounds makes me reflect on things like cultures, societies, values... I hope my novel will not only bring people the enjoyment of reading stories, but also prompt reflection about ourselves and the world around us.
The Next Chapter
Each year, The Wheeler Centre picks ten outstanding writers and gives them $15,000 to develop their work. They match them with a mentor and work closely with them on bringing their writing to life, connecting them with peers, publishers and readers.
The next round of applications will open in May 2020.
Read more here.